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Thursday 30 April 2009

The Swaggest Exam Techniques

Revision Isa Par.
As Stated previously, I got bare work to do!!

But I haven't forgotten you people!
I have 9 Exams incase you wanna know!

4 Law, 4 Economics, 1 Performance[I know, not really an exam is it?]

But anyway, I hate the actual exams more than the revision [CLEARLY]. But what do I hate more than exams?




















STUDENTS!

YES, YOU!

You guys take the piss!

I Dunno who i hate more...

1.the swag ones who ask for more sheets of paper.

WHY?! There was 16sheets in the booklet. What the hell could you POSSIBLY be writing!?

2.them guys that finish 30minutes early.

How DARE you have a nice quick nap whilst I'm bricking it like I had some dodge kebab from Salami's the night before.

3.them guys doing the rolex sweep.

YOU KNOW WHO I MEAN!!

Waving your arm around so much that you'd piss off Wiley/JME/Skepta. WHY DO IT!?

Making me vex and what not. Swear down, it makes wanna cry like....



[Taken after January Exam Results...SWAG!]
Right, before everything lets do a quick FAQ:

Q.Why don't you consistently update?
A: Cos I have a life which is filled with all this swagness. If I didn't how could i write about it!?

Q.Do you overexaggerate your stories?
A:No. Which is why most of them have photgraphic evidence.

Q.What is the point of this blog?
A:To bait out the FOOLISHNESS in the UK

Now...On To The Blog!

----------------------------------------------------------

So Help Me God.

I will NEVER forget this walk to college.

Usually, this would not have scared me but...

DAMN!

This was crazy. Basically, the 123 bus terminated...ON THE MOTORWAY[access road] .

So me and Eman decide to walk through a path...which we should never have chosen...

The reason for this was, two days previous, i watched "The Unborn". Don't see the relevance?

Well basically, there's one scene in the film where a dog turns its head round upside down...

Now imagine how I felt when this happened....[Allow my voice!]

Wednesday 8 April 2009

The Swaggest Drinker

Lets Start off with a little maths.

14 or so shots + severe travel sickness = WATER GUN!! [you'll see the relevance soon]

Now. It was one of my friends' birthday party of Sunday.
As usual, I was late...Pretty much 3 and a half hours late.
But thats not the point.
I reached the venue and I see, what I can only describe as
"A giant snail-race trail".

You can see the trail next to my Co-D Garry. [Real Talk Though, WTF Does Co-D mean?]



Now. I couldn't get a full recording of her because SOMEONE kept getting in the way.
But I got pictures of her on my "You've Been Swagg'd" Machine.



If you were there, I promise you wouldv'e laughed your nipples off.


I apologise for the jazz quality, my Nokia 6300 if SWAG @ night.

Now. I never recorded the actual water gun...that would just be grim.
However, I, and my CO-D[I dunno] did our own reinactment.



And that leads to....



She did him proud...


So What Have You Learned?




























SQUIRTLE'S WATERGUN ROCKS

The Swaggest Blogging System




They're SO Swag.
I wanted to move to them because they have an iPhone application, but its not worth it.
I can't even upload videos directly on to it. Telling me I have to upload it onto YouChoob or something, THEN embed it on my page.

NONSENSE!?

For this reason[and due to the lack of a logo] Garry says...



You'll see the relevance of that picture soon...