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Sunday 28 December 2008

The Swaggest..........WAIT A MINUTE!!!

RIGHT
Stop the presses
Call up BBC, ITV, Channel4, Channel5, E4, EVERYONE

I'm stopping Thatsswag.......







For this post =P
It has come to my attention that certain people don't know how to do certain things. So this post is dedicated to three important things that people need to learn to do..

So here we go!
Thatsswag.blogspot.com's very own ''HOW TO'' guide




•How to host an event

-If you're the host of a show. Don't have some dull voice cos you
just set the tone of the whole event. Especially if you have a time
limit. Wasting time will not get you a refund on your hire fee.

-Why on earth would you rent somewhere and say the event starts at 6 o
clock and you, as the organiser, reach at 8 o clock. Once again you
won't get a refund on your hire fee.

-If you want people to dance do NOT have seats or tables. They WILL
get sat on you waste. If you MUST have seats do NOT under any
circumstance have too many. It will just make the event look 10x
deader. So if it's dead already then you got a major KO.

-If your paying a DJ £500 then you should tell him what type of music
is played. If the music is dead you can't blame the DJ in anyway!

-Remember. If the venue is swag, you KO'ed your own event from the start

-If it's an African event, expect all left overs to be taken. Do not
expect to get a drink or food after the event as the chances are like
0.0000001%


•How to enjoy a shubz

-Certain girls act up infront of cameras like their models. It's a
party not a photoshoot

-Don't pay ten pounds entry to look militant in the corner of the
room. Don't player hate on people dancing either. That's like paying
ten pounds to hate on someones myspace. It don't make sense.

-If you can't handle your drink
Don't drink! Certain people will stamp you out for vomitting on their
top or spilling drink on them

-SKANK. If you can't skank two step. If you can't two step you
shouldve stayed at home.


•How to be an average grade London MC

Disclaimer: Taken From Boondocks - Story Of Gangstalicious



-Get a producer no one has heard of who makes catchy beats. If you
can't so that then : limewire>search>flukes

-If your gonna mc in public then make sure you take atleast 30 people
with you so that they can drown out the boo's

-Make up bars that people can't even hear properly but have easily
recognisable last words.
Example: klsj;agfakl;sjgfaskl;jfg;asjkgfklasgfklsgflkhasg reign, asjkl;jklfasjklfhkajsfhklsjfgkljasgfkljasgfjkla pain, shlakgfwuigrioasjlgfklgaslfashlgfj fame, shakjfaghskfhgalhkgfahkgwriasughfjihasj game

-Come up with a tagname that doesn't make sense. E.g. Tinchy Stryder.
Chipmunk. Devlin. Mojo. [I will cross these names off if you can tell me why they're named that]

-And do not forget, you must always talk alotta smack, like you been pushing drugs since 3, got shot at 7, shot someone at 12, became a drug lord and 15 and are now worth a millie.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hate ppl dat dnt skank (two step) at raves!!
Devlin is his surname btw

S.W.A.G said...

oh shame
I'm crossing his name out then!